108: Quit Trying to Reset Your Home…ADHD Brains Should Try This Instead!

Why “Resetting” Your House Doesn’t Work for ADHD Brains

Let’s talk about why the popular idea of a home “reset” doesn’t actually work for us, and what to try instead.

Resetting assumes something was ever fully “set”

You’ve probably seen those satisfying videos of someone resetting an immaculate kitchen, decanting everything, restocking the fridge, every item returned to its precise place. Equal parts satisfying and frustrating to watch, because resetting implies something was set that way to begin with. Think honestly about your own home: has any space ever actually reached that pinnacle where truly everything had a home and sat exactly where you wanted? Most of us fall short of that, often because our brains stop us right around ninety percent, a pattern worth noticing in itself. And even if a space did feel great once, was that ever truly its permanent, factory-set state, or just one moment that happened to work?

Our brains resist redoing something just because it worked before

Even if a routine or system genuinely worked at some point, novelty is a core craving for us, and simply repeating what once worked, without any of the original novelty, often just isn’t compelling anymore, no matter how effective it was. Our brains respond strongly to four things: interest, challenge, novelty, and urgency. When several of those line up at once, that’s when we feel like we’re operating on all cylinders. A system that worked once likely worked because it was new and interesting the first time, not because the system itself was inherently sustainable for us.

Try re-energizing instead of resetting

When a space feels overwhelming and you don’t know where to start, stop reaching for the word “reset” and ask instead how you can re-energize yourself about it. Look for what you haven’t tried before. If you’ve seen someone rearrange their kitchen in a way that looked interesting, even if it means moving cups closer to the fridge and figuring out what goes in that cabinet instead, try it. It might mean temporarily pulling a space further apart before it comes back together, and that’s okay.

Don’t let a “monkey brain” narrative talk you out of trying something new

A more linear thinker might see trying something that didn’t work before and immediately assume the new attempt is destined to fail too. Shut that down. Trying something and having it work once, then losing interest in repeating it, isn’t failure. Trying something that simply didn’t click isn’t failure either, it was just your brain being honest that it wasn’t engaged. Seeking novelty isn’t a symptom of failure, it’s literally how our brains are wired to make progress. Stop fighting it and lean into it instead.

Leave urgency out of this one, intentionally

Approach a stuck space without a deadline hanging over it. Go in with genuine curiosity, rubbing your hands together asking what new, challenging approach might actually hold your interest this time, rather than forcing yourself back into a system that’s already lost its spark.

Your practical, actionable step

Pick one space you’ve been trying to “reset” without success, and instead ask yourself what you haven’t tried yet. Give yourself permission to rearrange it in a genuinely new way, even if it gets messier before it gets better.

Until next time, continue to choose joy.