207: Overcoming Priority Paralysis: The First Step to Tackling Overwhelming Spaces

Priority Paralysis: Why “Motion” Beats “Right Order” Every Time

I recently had an absolutely trashed kitchen, stuff on every surface, and a flight to catch the next morning that I hadn’t even packed for. I promised I’d come back and explain exactly how I dug out of it, because that same freeze-up moment, standing in the doorway of an overwhelming space thinking “no way,” is one of the most common things I hear about.

What actually happens in a monkey brain versus a fish brain

If a monkey brain walked into that same kitchen, their brain would automatically start cataloging, prioritizing, and sequencing steps without much conscious effort, and they’d get moving in an efficient, ordered way. That’s genuinely great for them. But here’s the key: our fish brains are taking in the exact same information, with the exact same intelligence. The difference is what happens next. Somewhere in the process of trying to turn that information into an ordered list, it gets tangled: okay, I need to do this, but wait, that’s blocked by this other thing, so I need to handle that first, but that’s blocked too, so what actually comes first? There’s no mental holding tank, no push-pins keeping ideas in place while we rearrange them. The executive function step of turning information into a prioritized sequence is where things get stuck, not the intelligence behind it.

Where the shame usually comes from

If you’ve ever frozen up over this, it’s often because somewhere along the way a well-meaning monkey brain pointed out how you were doing something “wrong,” why didn’t you do this first, oh, that’s so inefficient, now you’ll have to do it twice, sometimes even with a little laugh attached. That reaction comes from a completely different kind of brain that genuinely doesn’t understand why this is hard for yours. It’s usually not intended to hurt. But you’re allowed to excuse it and let it go: you don’t have to do things the way monkeys do them. You’re a fish, and you’re going to do it the fish way.

There are no efficiency police

You will not get a gold star for optimal sequencing. You also won’t get a ticket for doing things in the “wrong” order. Nobody is checking. All that exists is a before and an after, and how you got from one to the other is entirely your own business.

So what?

This is the phrase to repeat to yourself. So what if you gather all the dirty dishes together first, only to realize you need to empty the sink before you can fill it with warm water. So what if you have to move them twice. So what if you open the dishwasher to load it and discover it’s still full of clean dishes, so you stop, dry your hands, and empty it first. So what if the “smarter” order would have been gathering trash, then food, then wiping counters all in one pass, and instead you went counter by counter. Two people can get in a car and take completely different routes to the same destination. Both still arrive. That’s the whole point.

Motion is the actual priority, not the sequence

The real thing keeping people stuck isn’t the mess itself, it’s priority paralysis, the endless loop of trying to figure out what to do first. I get asked constantly where to start, what’s first, how do I get going, and it’s almost always this same mental jam. Here’s the reframe: getting yourself in motion is the top priority. Not the “correct” first task. Just movement, any movement.

I’ll let you in on something: every single time I walk into a new client’s space, I feel overwhelmed for the first five minutes. I don’t know their stuff, their room, or the story behind what’s going on. I just start moving, because they’re paying me to move, and somewhere in that motion, clarity actually starts to arrive. The same thing works in your own space. Motion is priority number one. Everything else is just stuff, and if it takes longer because you didn’t do it in the most efficient order, so what. Time was going to pass either way, and you’ll feel dramatically better having actually moved than having stood frozen in the doorway a minute longer.

Your practical, actionable step

Next time you’re frozen looking at an overwhelming space, skip the search for the “right” first step. Let your eyes land on literally anything and start there. Repeat “so what” to yourself every time the order feels wrong, and keep moving anyway.

Until next time, continue to choose joy.